A decision made with a heavy heart, this is how I feel right now. Michael and I have decided to put Jordan back into public school. This decision was not made lightly. Its not the ideal situation. Its not the perfect solution. But for this moment and at this time in our lives we feel this is the best solution.
I have been home schooling Jordan since September. Prior to that my sister in law home schooled him. He seemed to do well there. I felt like from day one that Jordan and I were having problems. Almost everyday we were struggling. I started to notice that his math skills weren’t where they should be. This became a sore spot. Then as the weeks by Jordan seemed to really dislike having school everyday. It seemed a battle everyday to just get him to concentrate on this school work. He seemed to rush through school work so that he could do something else. Jordan is not a self-starter. I had to be on him the entire time. Things were alright before Emma arrived. Between her and Conor its almost impossible for Jordan to do his school work, study or even absorb any of what he’s learning. I started to have the feeling like he just wasn’t getting it. Any of it.
I started to talk to Mike about my concerns, started looking up testing websites to see if I could figure out where Jordan might be. His math skills were way below where they should be. Otherwise he seemed to be doing alright. I think his reading comprehension needs to be worked on. I also think that Jordan may need a break from me and the chaos that has become our house since Emma arrived. That may sound weird to some but it’s the truth. Jordan and I are a lot alike and we tend to but heads.
I think Jordan will like going back to school. Yes I know all the cons of public school. I do not need to be reminded of how Oklahoma is failing in the public school area. I think Jordan will enjoy being around other kids and hopefully he will make some friends. Our mornings really aren’t all that crazy either. The kids are usually up early anyway and Mike can take Jordan on his way to work, the school is like 2 minutes away. I can walk over to the school to pick him up or on the bad weather days I can have him picked up.
So although this was a hard decision we feel this is going to be a good thing. Please pray that the adjustments go smoothly. Jordan isn’t the only one that has to adjust. Conor is somewhat lonely without Jordan at home. He loves his brother so much. Only time will tell how things will turn out, heres to hoping all goes well!
Monday, November 1, 2010
The Choices We Make
DISCLAIMER: DO NOT READ IF YOU DISAGREE WITH BIRTH CONTROL!!! I AM NOT AIMING THIS AT ANY ONE PERSON. I AM TALKING TO SEVERAL PEOPLE. PLEASE DO NOT TAKE PERSONALLY.
The choices we make can sometimes effect more than just ourselves. Because of this I would like to address those out there who have made comments to me recently about our decision not to have anymore kids. First of all its between me and God. Secondly its between Michael and I. We decided about 6 months into pregnancy that we didn’t want to have anymore children. We have many reasons for this. Money, space, time, and the fact that we are getting older and would like to someday have lives of our own that don’t revolve around children. Now don’t misunderstand me here, we love our kids, but the truth is we also love each other and would like to be able to just be a couple again.
The decision not to have anymore kids was not one made lightly. We knew this would be a permanent thing. I was the one going back and forth more than he but the more we talked about it the more we knew it was the right decision. Yes I am very fertile. I have no problems getting pregnant. When we decided to have another baby I told Michael it was now or never and within two weeks I was pregnant with Emma. The only kid I ever planned J. I have heard everything from “I think you made a wise choice”, to “Your going to hell.” There are those who say I am messing with Gods plan and to rely on him to take care of our every need. Although God will take care of us he also expects us to be wise and self-sufficient. You cant just sit there and say “ I’m not going to pay this bill because God will take care of it.” He’s not a magician, He’s not going to make it just disappear.
We also think that three is enough. There is no reason in today’s society to have a huge family. I believe its irresponsible to have more kids than you can provide for especially if you aren’t responsible in other areas. My mom works at a local hospital and sees this everyday. Women who come in with 4 or 5 kids and one on the way, women who have their kids taken away because they are on drugs or alcohol or they’re abusive to their kids. I believe having children is a privilege not a right. Now I know I am going to make some people angry with what I have said. But I make no apologies for how I feel. I feel that if you make the decision not to use birth control that all facets of your life need to be looked over. If I get pregnant what are the ramifications of this decision? Where am I in my life? How will this impact my life at this moment? If you already have kids how will it affect them? How will it affect us financially, space wise, and time wise? There are so many things to consider. I don’t believe that having a child should be a lightly made decision. It’s a person, another person to care for, to pay for, make space for.
I guess I’ve said that I wanted to. I know that there are a lot of people out there who disagree with me. Some of those may be friends and family. But hey this is America right, if people out there can pop out kids left and right then I can say what I want!
The choices we make can sometimes effect more than just ourselves. Because of this I would like to address those out there who have made comments to me recently about our decision not to have anymore kids. First of all its between me and God. Secondly its between Michael and I. We decided about 6 months into pregnancy that we didn’t want to have anymore children. We have many reasons for this. Money, space, time, and the fact that we are getting older and would like to someday have lives of our own that don’t revolve around children. Now don’t misunderstand me here, we love our kids, but the truth is we also love each other and would like to be able to just be a couple again.
The decision not to have anymore kids was not one made lightly. We knew this would be a permanent thing. I was the one going back and forth more than he but the more we talked about it the more we knew it was the right decision. Yes I am very fertile. I have no problems getting pregnant. When we decided to have another baby I told Michael it was now or never and within two weeks I was pregnant with Emma. The only kid I ever planned J. I have heard everything from “I think you made a wise choice”, to “Your going to hell.” There are those who say I am messing with Gods plan and to rely on him to take care of our every need. Although God will take care of us he also expects us to be wise and self-sufficient. You cant just sit there and say “ I’m not going to pay this bill because God will take care of it.” He’s not a magician, He’s not going to make it just disappear.
We also think that three is enough. There is no reason in today’s society to have a huge family. I believe its irresponsible to have more kids than you can provide for especially if you aren’t responsible in other areas. My mom works at a local hospital and sees this everyday. Women who come in with 4 or 5 kids and one on the way, women who have their kids taken away because they are on drugs or alcohol or they’re abusive to their kids. I believe having children is a privilege not a right. Now I know I am going to make some people angry with what I have said. But I make no apologies for how I feel. I feel that if you make the decision not to use birth control that all facets of your life need to be looked over. If I get pregnant what are the ramifications of this decision? Where am I in my life? How will this impact my life at this moment? If you already have kids how will it affect them? How will it affect us financially, space wise, and time wise? There are so many things to consider. I don’t believe that having a child should be a lightly made decision. It’s a person, another person to care for, to pay for, make space for.
I guess I’ve said that I wanted to. I know that there are a lot of people out there who disagree with me. Some of those may be friends and family. But hey this is America right, if people out there can pop out kids left and right then I can say what I want!
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